Medellin Colombia. Our favorite place in the earth. You will find the most beautiful women in the world and the best yayo in one central location. The weather is fresh, not too sunny and not too cold. The rain comes and goes but not the hoes. They stay in Medellin.
It’s Wednesday, our second night on our first Medellin trip in 2017. There isn’t much to do in town besides strip clubs on a Wednesday night. All the bars are dead but the strip clubs always have something going on. There are various strip clubs; however, for this night we decided to stay at one closer to El Poblado. These strip clubs are not like the ones you find in the USA. If you see a girl you like and you want to fuck her, you can fuck her inside and or take her out (after paying a take-out fee to the strip club).
Prior to going out, we manage to score some blow from a taxi driver. If you know Spanish, buying blow is really easy from the cab drivers. We’ll provide a guide on this in a different article. The stuff we received was some fish scale grade blow. This is stuff that’s really hard to find in the USA since it isn’t cut up. We paid about $10 a gram but gave the guy $5 tip since this shit was so cheap compared to the US. My boy and I took some bumps and our shit went numb right away. We knew we scored some good stuff.
We get to our hotel, which is guest friendly. Medellin is trying to curb sex tourism but the money is too good for some hotels not to be guest friendly. If you’re going to bring bitches back to your place, whores or normal bitches, we highly suggest you get a guest friendly hotel. We pre-gammed with some Grand Old Parr Whisky. It was the first time we had this brand of scotch whiskey and god damn it was good. Paired up with some bumps of pure Colombian yayo, and we were feeling good on our second night in Medellin.
We hail a cab, tell him the name of the strip club.
He responds with: “Ah CHICAS! SI AMIGO”
Our conversation with the cab driver was short. TLDR he said Medellin has the best looking bitches in the world, and we agreed. We arrive at the strip club and paid only $3 USD for the 10 minute ride from the hotel. Outside the strip club there are about 5-7 cabs waiting. We see some happy looking as dudes walking with a stripper to the cabañas. That guy was definitely getting laid. There’s cover to get in, 10,000 Colombian pesos (about $3.50). There’s about 2 security guards posted up front and they frisk you prior to going in.
Then we get in and WOW. There’s about 25 strippers working looking like some proper whores ready to make some money. Two girls are dancing on stage completely naked, showing pussy. The music is some Colombian EDM remix and we fucked with it, probably because we were yay’d out. There’s a bar on the side and tables around the stage. We talked to one of the waiters and let him know we want a bottle of Old Parr and a table on the side the stage.
We get our table and start drinking whiskey cokes. Take breaks to the bathroom to do some bumps since we can’t do this shit in the open. I make sure not to take too much blow since this shit can make you go soft while fucking. Bitches are spot-on eyeballing us like lions do when they stalk an Impala in the Savanna. Three of them come over to our table, make some small talk and we give them some of that Old Parr.
Of the three, one of them garnered my interest. She’s slim, no fake ass or tits. No visible tattoos and her face doesn’t have that 1000 cock stare most of these hoes have. She must be a new girl, so I decided right then and there to take this bitch to pound town. I pay the fee to fuck and take this girl to the cabaña.
I bust out the blow and we decide to do a couple bumps before hopping in the shower. However, I didn’t have my keys or anything to do lines with. Ole girl has long finger nails and we’re just do bumps of her nails. BIG MISTAKE because I wasn’t sure how much blow she was putting in her nails, and she would just shove that booger candy right up my nose. She did another bump and we hop in the shower. We dry off and proceed to do another BUMP the same way. At this point, I am feeling too good and COCO and proceed to get on with the fucking.
I put the bitch on her back and proceed to go to pound town. Put her legs on my shoulders and fucked away. About 3 minutes in my hearts starts beating faster and faster. I get a bit nervous and then BOOM. It happened. I went soft in Medellin. Coked out, my dick went soft as baby shit. Nothing could make it get hard again, not even this hot 8/10 Colombian whore. This is what happens when you let someone else give you bumps without knowing how much blow is in the bump. I took too much blow. I tell the bitch to suck my dick and nothing, pure softness. She takes a break and tries again, nothing. My hour with the whore is almost up, I said fuck it and head back to the club.
Head outside and chain-smoke two Lucky Striker reds. I proceed to drink a shitton more whiskey and mess around with the girls in the club. I was so COCO I knew I wasn’t going to fuck again that night. My boy comes back from the cabaña and he happily told me he successfully busted a nut, not once but twice. We finish our bottle and head over to the one of the few bars open in Parque Lleras. I told my boy what happened and he couldn’t stop laughing. Lesson learned, do not let a hoe give you your blow, only blow jobs.